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Old 11-30-11, 12:07 PM
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janny108 janny108 is offline
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Default sister and Thanksgiving

I emailed everyone I normally have contact with, it's my monthly newsletter.
My sister says because I did not talk to her on Thanksgiving, I sort of "pushed her aside". We talked to dad, our son who was staying there, and then our son talked to our daughter, and his dad. By the time they were finished, we had to go to our meal.

She said she was standing next to him when we called, but Alex never said anything like "do you want to talk to Nan?"It was the first time he'd gone to my dad's for anything. And she evidently did not say anything like "can I talk to her?" Which is why I don't like calling on a holiday because some people talk on the phone and some don't. It's good to call but it's not.

This to me sounds trivial. Nan is the kind of person who sort of whines until she gets what she wants. She believes what our now deceased mother said about "the squeaky wheel gets the grease".

I know as Christians we are not to really whine about anything, she did this until her husband quit smoking. I just can't see myself doing that just to get someone to do something I want. (I want my husband to quit too but I'm praying about it more than I'm telling him to quit).
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Old 11-30-11, 04:07 PM
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Just let her know you had no idea she was standing there and would not have deliberately hurt her feelings. and love her like she is. We all have so many imperfections that as you said we have no excuse to whine just to0 pray for one another
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1Peter 2:24 Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.

And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. ... Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. Matthew 25:40 & 45

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Old 11-30-11, 08:44 PM
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Ah, yes, the happy holidays. They always bring out the best in families.
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Old 12-01-11, 07:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by janny108 View Post
I emailed everyone I normally have contact with, it's my monthly newsletter.
My sister says because I did not talk to her on Thanksgiving, I sort of "pushed her aside". We talked to dad, our son who was staying there, and then our son talked to our daughter, and his dad. By the time they were finished, we had to go to our meal.

She said she was standing next to him when we called, but Alex never said anything like "do you want to talk to Nan?"It was the first time he'd gone to my dad's for anything. And she evidently did not say anything like "can I talk to her?" Which is why I don't like calling on a holiday because some people talk on the phone and some don't. It's good to call but it's not.

This to me sounds trivial. Nan is the kind of person who sort of whines until she gets what she wants. She believes what our now deceased mother said about "the squeaky wheel gets the grease".

I know as Christians we are not to really whine about anything, she did this until her husband quit smoking. I just can't see myself doing that just to get someone to do something I want. (I want my husband to quit too but I'm praying about it more than I'm telling him to quit).
When one shares the attribute of love, with others, the legacy which is passed-on is rich and everlasting in the hearts of those we touch. May the pathway we walk enable us to bestow a bountiful harvest of spiritual fruit in the hearts and lives of those around.

1 Cor. 13:
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

The holidays often magnify existing emotions. We cannot truly see from the heart and understanding of another.

Fire of resentment can be kindled from what we would consider minor but another considers important. It sounds like Nan was standing close by the phone to wish her sister Thanksgiving blessings and felt shoved aside and ignored. If she is self-absorbed this perception would be magnified.

An apology and deepest of sympathy for another one's perspective can minister a great deal of healing for imagined wounds, and the smoothing of ruffled feathers. I do not ever want to look back and realize that I failed to speak words of love and encouragement when last I spoke with them and I will never have that opportunity again.

Being old and grey I have lost many family members, and so often am called to bring words of comfort and memorial. The very last words spoken to another will be carried the rest of ones life. Will they be words of anger and misunderstanding or will our very last words be words of love, will they represent Christ, and will they encourage the other?

When I hang up the phone I never know if I will ever be able to speak to that dear-one again. Especially with each of my children, and with all of my family I end the phone call with "I love you", and "Lord be with you". If this old feller were to get called Home, and never speak to them again, they can remember that I told them I loved them, and prayed a benediction over them.

May our Father be with you and bless you and your dear-ones this holiday season and all through the coming year.
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Create in me a clean heart,
O God; and renew a right
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Nemo surdior est quam is qui non audiet - No man is more deaf than he who will not hear

Last edited by Caretaker; 12-01-11 at 08:08 AM.
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Old 12-01-11, 09:33 AM
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we got it straight yesterday. I apologized for any confusion. Our son never told me she was near him when he made the call.
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Old 12-01-11, 09:38 AM
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we got it straight yesterday. I apologized for any confusion. Our son never told me she was near him when he made the call.
I am so glad and what a precious blessing you are. God bless you.
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A Servant of Christ,
Drew

Create in me a clean heart,
O God; and renew a right
spirit within me. Psalm 51:10

Nemo surdior est quam is qui non audiet - No man is more deaf than he who will not hear
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Old 12-01-11, 04:12 PM
Susan Susan is offline
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I've had to get to the point where I understand that I am only responsible for my attitude, and my actions, and not those of other people. I don't (knowingly) ever start anything with family members, and I'm learning to be quiet, hear them out, and then just walk away quietly. I cannot afford to be dragged into someone else's drama. I am open to reconciliation. That, however, requires the cooperation of at least three people: Jesus, and at least two family members.
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